It is easy to claim principles and values with mere words, yet it is difficult to practice them faithfully until reaching the ultimate satisfaction.
Allah Almighty says in Surah Al-Qasas, “Do people think that they will be left to say ‘We believe’ and they will not be tested?”
Islam does not compel anyone to judge what is in people’s hearts; society can only see the apparent actions, and there is no justification for judging consciences.
However, Islam has a unique stance on imposing a material obligation in the marriage covenant called “Sadaq.”
Sadaq linguistically comes from the root sadaq, which means to be truthful or to verify.
Technically, Ahmad Ali Taha Rayan, a member of the Council of Senior Scholars at Al-Azhar and a Maliki jurist from Egypt explains in his book Family Fiqh (2005) what constitutes compensation in marriage. This can be broader than just being monetary or non-monetary, immediate or deferred, specified money or benefits, and includes other things that can validly constitute compensation in a contract of sale or lease.
Revealing People through Money Matters.
Ibn Taymiyyah mentioned, “A man praised a witness who came to testify before the caliph Umar ibn al-Khattab. Umar asked: Are you his closest neighbour who knows his evening and morning routines? The man said no. Umar asked: Have you dealt with him in money matters which test people’s honesty? The man said no. Umar asked: Have you travelled with him, which reveals people’s true character? The man said no. Umar concluded: Then you do not know him, and perhaps you judged him by seeing him performing some prayers in a mosque!”
What is the linguistic relationship between (Sadaq) and truth (al-sidq)? Both are derived from the root ‘s-d-q.’
It is well-known that sweet talk is common between genders before a commitment. Each shows the best of themselves to attract the other, appearing in their finest form.
Islam has not ignored this deceptive beautification; it uniquely addresses this by making it obligatory for a man to provide a sadaq to a woman if he wishes to marry, without a minimum or maximum limit, akin to the test of money matters that reveals the true inclinations of the self.
This test reveals a man’s stinginess or generosity according to his capabilities and exposes whether a woman and her family are excessively demanding in their matrimonial expectations.
It is a test of materialism that uncovers much beyond superficial social gatherings, gummy smiles, and flattering words.
I see the sadaq as a moral filter revealing a significant aspect of both parties’ character, a practical test in the courtship phase where only the genuine succeed. The blessing in marriage comes only among souls deserving of each other, content and satisfied. There is no contentment without heartfelt generosity, regardless of financial constraints, and no greed without some form of selfishness or stinginess.
Sadaq is a simple test of the purity of good intentions between two strangers who establish a family on life’s journey, creating one of the strongest human bonds, a blood bond.
Some Evidence for The Obligation of Sadaq in Islam.
Among the evidence for the obligation of sadaq in Islam is the verse from Surah An-Nisa, “And give the women [upon marriage] their [bridal] gifts graciously …” and another verse from the same Surah, “…then marry them with the permission of their people and give them their due compensation [sadaq] in a manner that is acceptable, [they being] chaste, not fornicating, nor taking secret lovers.”
No one has the right to take anything from a woman’s sadaq, neither her guardian nor her husband. This led to the prohibition of ‘Shighar Marriage’, where a woman’s guardian would marry her off to a man in exchange for that man marrying his female relative to him in a reciprocal arrangement.
The Ideal Sadaq
Islam has not set a maximum limit for the amount of the sadaq. Allah says in Surah An-Nisa: “If you wish to replace one wife with another and you have given one of them a great amount [in gifts], do not take [back] from it anything. Would you take it in injustice and manifest sin? How could you take it while you have gone in unto each other, and they have taken from you a solemn covenant?”
Despite the absence of a maximum limit for the sadaq, Islam encourages reducing the amount and marrying off the poor, as stated in Surah An-Nur: “And marry the unmarried among you and the righteous among your male slaves and female slaves. If they should be poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty, and Allah is all-encompassing and knowing.”
Aisha reported that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “The blessed women are those who are easiest to propose to, whose sadaq is easy, and who give birth easily.”
Abu Huraira reported that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “If someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks for your daughter in marriage, comply with his request. If you do not do so, there will be corruption and great evil on earth.”
Umar ibn al-Khattab initially wanted to set a cap to prevent excessive sadaqs but soon retracted this idea. Narrated by Ahmad, Tirmidhi, Abu Dawud, Ibn Majah, and others, Umar said: “Do not exaggerate the sadaqs of women. If it were a mark of honour in this world or piety before Allah, the Prophet (ﷺ) would have been the first to do so. It is known that the Prophet (ﷺ) did not marry any of his wives nor marry off his daughters for more than twelve uqiyyah.”
Ibn Kathir explains that Umar said: “Why do you increase sadaqs for women when the Prophet (ﷺ), his companions, and their sadaqs were only up to 400 dirhams or less? If increasing it were a sign of piety or honour, why did you precede them?” A Qurashi woman then approached him, saying, “O Amir of believers, have you not heard what Allah revealed in the Quran?” He asked, “What is that?” She said, “Did you not hear Allah say, ‘and you have given one of them a great amount [in gifts]?’ Umar replied, “May Allah forgive me; all people are more understanding than Umar.” He then returned to the pulpit and said, “I had forbidden you from exceeding the sadaq of women to more than 400 dirhams, but anyone who wishes may give from his wealth whatever he likes.”
In another narration by Abu Ya’la, which includes Mujalid ibn Sa’id Ziyada, Ibn al-Khattab said, “The woman was right, and Umar was wrong.”
Some Cases in Which Sadaq Is Obligatory and Others Where It Is Not
The immediate and deferred sadaq is a right for the wife and a debt on the husband for life. If he dies before her, the woman is entitled to deduct it from the estate in addition to her legal share of the inheritance from her husband.
If a man divorces his wife after the marriage contract but before consummation or lawful seclusion, she is entitled to half the agreed sadaq. However, suppose the woman or her guardian forgives this money. In that case, it is closer to piety, following the verse in Surah Al-Baqarah: “And if you divorce them before you have touched them, and you have appointed unto them a portion, then [pay] half of that, unless they (the women) agree to forego it, or he, in whose hand is the marriage tie, agrees to forego and give her the full amount. And to forego is nearer to piety. Do not forget liberality between yourselves. Indeed Allah is what you do, Seeing.”
Suppose a woman asks a judge to separate her from her husband without him wanting to divorce her and without a legitimate reason she can prove. In that case, it is permissible for the man to ask her for financial compensation for the financial burdens he bore in marrying her.
This profound wisdom protects men from women exploiting them by entering into marriage without the intention of continuity and then seeking a divorce without a legitimate reason except to collect money or to marry another man after separation.
What fault is there in a man who worked hard and saved money, and perhaps borrowed, to marry, preserve his dignity, and build a family, only to be surprised that his wife requests a divorce or separation without any fault or wrongdoing on his part? And how can a man who has gone through such a bitter experience trust another woman, having been financially drained through no fault or wrongdoing of his own?
Allah says in Surah Al-Baqarah: “Divorce is twice. Then, either keep [her] in an acceptable manner or release [her] with good treatment. And it is not lawful for you to take back anything that you have given them unless both fear that they will not be able to keep [within] the limits of Allah. But if you fear that they will not keep [within] the limits of Allah, then there is no sin upon either of them concerning that by which she ransoms herself. These are the limits of Allah, so do not transgress them. And whoever transgresses the limits of Allah, it is those who are the wrongdoers.”
Abdullah Ibn Abbas narrated in Sahih al-Bukhari that Thabit bin Qais’s wife came to the Prophet ﷺ and said, “O Messenger of Allah, I do not reproach Thabit bin Qais in character or religion, but I do not want to live in disbelief in Islam.” The Messenger of Allah ﷺ asked, “Will you give back the garden [sadaq] to him?” She said, “Yes.” The Messenger of Allah ﷺ then told him, “Accept the garden and divorce her once.”
Some Arab Laws Regulating Sadaqs
Arab laws are similar in their provisions concerning sadaqs. Qatari lawyer Fawzia Al-Obaidli explained that Qatari Family Law No. (22) of 2006 stipulates that “the sadaq is the money given by the husband with the intention of marriage. Anything legally committed can be a sadaq,” and it is a right exclusively for the wife “to dispose of as she wishes and any contrary condition is not considered valid.” Additionally, “the wife may refuse to cohabit until she receives her prompt sadaq, and if the wife agrees to cohabit before receiving her sadaq from the husband, it becomes a debt owed by him.”
The Moroccan Family Code (MOUDAWANA) also shares this view, stating, “The sadaq is what the husband presents to his wife to express his desire for marriage and to establish a stable family, and to lay the foundations of affection and companionship between the spouses. Its basis is its symbolic and moral value, not its material value,” and it also sees “the sadaq as the woman’s property to dispose of as she wishes. The husband has no right to demand any furniture or otherwise in exchange for the sadaq he has given her.”
The Qatari Family Law specifies the wife’s rights over her husband as: “the sadaq, lawful maintenance, allowing her to visit her parents and relatives in a mutual goodness, not interfering with her personal finances, not physically or morally harming her, and being just between her and other wives if the husband has more than one.”
The rights of the husband over his wife are summarized as: “caring for him and obeying him in mutual goodness, maintaining herself and his property, supervising the house and managing its affairs, caring for their children from her and breastfeeding them unless there is a legal impediment.”
Al-Obaidli added that the sadaq, both prompt and deferred, does not lapse after marriage and consummation and is considered a debt on the husband’s neck, as the Qatari Family Law states, “The sadaq may be expedited or deferred, in whole or in part, at the time of the contract, and the sadaq is obligatory by a valid contract, and all of it is confirmed by consummation, lawful seclusion, or death, and the deferred part becomes due at the specified term, and this term lapses by separation or death.”
The Moroccan Family Code also stipulates, “The sadaq is to be paid at the agreed term to the wife demanding the payment of the current sadaq before the start of marital cohabitation. If marital cohabitation occurs before payment, the sadaq becomes a debt in the husband’s obligation.”
In the event of divorce by the husband before consummation, according to Qatari Family Law, “the divorced woman before consummation is entitled to half of the sadaq if it was specified; if it was not specified or if the specification was invalid, the judge grants her a compensation not exceeding half of her like’s sadaq.”
Al-Obaidli clarified that the woman’s right to sadaq and compensation according to Article 41 lapses “if the separation occurs due to the wife before consummation or lawful seclusion.”
She added that the wife who desires separation without justification is obliged to return the sadaq and any money she has received, according to Article 136, which stipulates, “If the wife requests separation before consummation and offers her sadaq and what she has received from money and waives her financial rights, and the husband refuses to divorce her without acceptable justification, the judge should make efforts to reconcile them, and if this fails and the conflict is severe, he shall rule for their separation on the sadaq offered.”
In the case of Khul’, after the contract and consummation, the woman is obliged to return the sadaq according to Article 122 of the Qatari Family Law, which states, “If the spouses do not agree on the Khul’, the court should attempt to reconcile the spouses and appoint two arbitrators to facilitate reconciliation efforts within a period not exceeding six months. If the arbitrators do not achieve reconciliation, and the wife seeking the Khul’ offers to waive all her lawful financial rights and returns to him the sadaq he gave her, the court shall rule for their separation.”
If a man refuses to pay the agreed sadaq, according to Article 128, “a divorce is granted to a wife who has not been consummated if the husband fails to pay her immediate sadaq in the following two cases: if the husband has no apparent wealth from which the sadaq can be taken, or if the husband is insolvent or of unknown financial status, and the period set by the judge for the payment of the immediate sadaq has expired, and he has not paid.”
In the case of a wife who has been consummated and has not received her full sadaq, according to the same article, “the wife is not divorced after consummation for failing to pay her immediate sadaq, and it remains a debt on the husband.”
However, according to Article 136, “if the wife seeks a divorce before consummation, offers her sadaq and whatever she has received in terms of money, and relinquishes her financial rights, and the husband refuses to divorce her without acceptable justification, the judge shall make an effort to reconcile them. If reconciliation is impossible and the conflict is irreconcilable, the judge shall rule for separation based on the wealth offered.”
In the case of engagement before the contract, according to Article 7, “if the fiancé gives the fiancée money before the contract as part of the sadaq, and then one party changes their mind about the engagement, or if one party dies during it, the fiancé or his heirs have the right to recover exactly what was given if it still exists, otherwise its equivalent or its value on the day of receipt. If the fiancée purchases items for her sadaq or part of it and then the fiancé changes his mind, she has the option to return the sadaq or deliver what equates to it from the items bought in full or part at the time of purchase along with the rest of the sadaq.”
This is also reflected in the Moroccan Family Code, which states, “if the fiancé presents the sadaq or part of it, and there is a retraction from the engagement, or one of the parties dies during it, the fiancé or his heirs have the right to recover exactly what was given if it still exists, otherwise its equivalent or its value on the day it was received. If the fiancée does not wish to pay the amount converted into items, the party responsible for the retraction bears any loss between the value of the items and the amount paid for them.”
The Qatari Family Law, in its eighth article, states, ” If the engagement ends due to death, or for a reason beyond either party’s control, or due to an impediment that prevents marriage, nothing from the gifts is to be recovered.”
Understanding the Text and The Spirit of The Text Dilemma
Amidst this vast network of religious legislation and legal clauses derived from it to protect the family and regulate social relationships, some individuals from both genders manipulate these laws without any moral restraint, as if the divine author of the religious text – God forbid – is unaware of the hearts of those who claim to adhere to it, or as if there is no Day of Judgment to come where limbs will testify against their owners.
It may be perceived that the sadaq in Islam commodifies women, a superficial view that devalues the material aspect, as if humans are spirits without bodies. In contrast, Islam balances humans’ spiritual, material, and intellectual needs.
Can a person sell themselves for money, whether male or female, if not for greed or compelling need?
Do not some men, like some women, marry someone they do not like out of greed for money or power or due to compelling circumstances?
Should the religious text be expected to eradicate greed or exploitation from people who do not truly believe in it in the first place? Or is belief in the religious text a prerequisite, not a result?
Have humans known any spiritual generosity without material means?
Would encouragement and praise be spoken without a throat and vocal cords of flesh and blood?
Would there be a friendly smile without the movement of facial muscles or signals from the nervous system?
Would a child feel a mother’s tender touch without the touch sensors in the skin?
Similarly, the sadaq, which is a material act, expresses emotional feelings and psychological contents, indispensable for conveying them in a divine miraculous test of the man’s generosity and the woman’s greed.
If she excessively demands, it warns the man to flee from a greedy or vain woman. If the man skimps on the sadaq amount beyond his capability, it warns the woman to escape from a selfish man who puts his emotions before his money.
If, hypothetically, the sadaq were not obligatory, would greed and exploitation between the genders disappear?
Does not this material test before marriage save both parties from becoming entangled in a toxic relationship?
And is there a more fitting reward than the blessing of a flourishing family nurtured by the man’s generous spirit and sheltered by the woman’s contentment?
